So ya'll now know I'm bipolar right? (I mean that's assuming that you read my first introduction blog...) I'm going to tell you something that I don't tell other people (wow don't you feel special!). I have been to what people refer to as "The Loony Bin" or aka the Mental health department wing of the hospital. Yeah, it's really nothing I like to brag about because I'm in there for well....being "mental". But while at this "wonderful", "happy", place I gained some awesome friends and we decided to have fun. Why not have fun? I mean you're already considered a "loony". Why not liven it up a little? So I came up with a list of things that I did that you probably shouldn't do....that is, if you're gonna go there some day.
Ok so things that I have learned not to do:
At the hospital they have very lame activities there, like coloring, boondogoling (how ever the heck you spell that), making hemp bracelets (that's a great idea! give us something to smoke when we leave), and painting ceramic thingamagiggers. Well, I got to paint a ceramic dog....it ended up looking like Cujo, in fact that's what I named it. After I painted this one of the techs wanted to play scrabble with me (because I'm just awesome like that). While we were playing I got stuck on a turn and suddenly referred to Cujo and said "What was that?"...."No, I can't do that. That's not even a word." Then the tech replies "umm...who are you talking to?" so I say "Cujo, of course, who else would I be talking to?" Apparently the techs frown on this and you later hear about it from your personal therapist.
Techs and doctors also don't like it when you keep changing your name on them. I had a ton of names.
I had an awesome roommate and we would stay up talking all night and we decided to leave notes in our window for the techs who check in on us every 15 minutes. Some of the notes said "Come back in 15 minutes....we'll be waiting." Apparently these kind of things are ok to do. But it's not ok to put tooth paste in your mouth so it will foam up and rise up very slowly in the window while the night tech is checking on you.
We had an awesome ping pong table and I was hitting the ball against the wall just cause I was bored when a tech came in and asked "what are you doing?" (really he's going to ask me that question? I'm feeding a lion, what does it look like I'm doing?) So I said "I'm in a tournament with Steve, he's kicking my trash." (since this was my second reference to being with a "person" I have reason to believe this is why they kept me an extra day...I'm just sayin')
In the morning the nurses hand out your medication. Well, I was feeling particularly perky one morning and kept bugging the nurse saying "can I have my meds now!!!" like a million times really fast while bouncing. If you do this another nurse (the head nurse) will ask you questions about being an addict. You will later be talked to by your nurse practitioner (the one who prescribes you the drugs).
When playing a get to know you game and you are allowed to ask any kind of question stay away from: "Do the aliens tell you what to do too?" and "If you could be an animal which alien would take over your mind and control it?" (that second one just scares the person you asked, luckily I asked a guy who knew me so he was cool with it but others in the circle had different opinions)
When asked by your therapist "What are you going to do when you get out?" you shouldn't say "I'm going to go outside naked with hot pink stilettos and say "hi" to all of my neighbors!" Yeah I had to write a paper about what I was actually going to do. FYI that paper said the exact same thing that I told him :)
Also during craft making activities the techs really frown upon you if you make a noose and tie it around the ceramic Cujo dog you just made. (though the dog was so badly painted I literally heard it whine a little when the tech took the noose away)
This doesn't pertain to anything but, on my last stay I got a bed that moved up and down and vertically, and sideways! It was better than Disneyland!!! (they don't like you to play with the beds but I mean COME ON! It moves!)
On one of my first times I was at the "Loony Bin" I couldn't sleep. So i sat with my light on and just sat up, starring hoping that I could stare myself to sleep... (there was nothing else I could do, I didn't have a book and I couldn't write or color) when the night tech comes in and asks "what's the matter?" I replied "I'm plotting revenge on the aliens that abducted me and sent me here on this nasty planet!"
So yeah if you're ever gonna go to the "loony bin" have some fun (As long as it doesn't get you extra days locked up). ;)
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