MY DAY IS RUINED!!!!!! RUINED I SAY!!!!

Oh my gosh this is the worst day of my life!!!!!

So I get to work on time and I'm efficient and getting everything done when I remember "Oh my gosh! I have a twinkie in my desk!!!" Then I think "No, Megan, you shouldn't have a twinkie so early in the morning it's 8 AM it will look gross to everyone that you are having a Twinkie for breakfast! So you wait. You know you will want it later and you will want it so much more than you want it now, and it will taste so delicious and delectable that you will devour it and savor it with so much love and cherish that moment forever!"

I take my twinkies very, VERY seriously. So seriously that I found out that my husband doesn't like the full twinkie and I nearly divorced him right then and there. You do not diss the twinkie. It is perfect and fabulous the way it is! The day they got rid of them I literally cried, and when I heard they were bringing it back I was so happy you'd thought I'd won the lottery, and the day they actually came out I practically bought half the aisle. If I could marry a twinkie I would, though I would eat it and it's family at the reception and I'd be charged with murder of my spouse but it would be worth it.

So now that you know my love for twinkies you can only imagine my reaction when 9 AM came around and I said "ALRIGHT IT IS TIME YO!!! That twinkie is going down! I am going to eat this piece of heaven and love every second and every bite that I have with it!"  I open my drawer and what do I find NOTHING!!!! IT WAS GONE!!!!!!! I literally tore my desk apart and rummaged through every where I could think of.  I tore my work apart!!! My boss came out and was wondering what the ruckus was and I was almost in tears. She thought someone had died or something, and when I told her about the twinkie she just kind of stared at me and didn't know if she should console me or laugh. I think I would have quit if she laughed. But I am in so much distress at this moment that I am dying inside.DYING!!! It is only 9 AM and my day is already ruined. Thank heavens I have a Coke. Best thing in life is a Twinkie and a Coke. Nothing makes a day better than that combination, unless you have sour patch kids with the combo then it's like a supernova that went inside your stomach and it brings the tinglyness and everything seems so warm and happy and it's like your soul has become translated into an ever being person and God has personally touched it.  Best. Thing. Ever. It makes your life complete.

Yeah I'm going to have diabetes by the time I'm 25 but it is going to be worth it.  When I'm on dialysis, I am going to still be eating a twinkie and while the doctor is trying to rip it out of my hands I am going to tell him to shove it and deal with it! I am dying a happy person!